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Vultures

by Levees

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1.
Leaving 03:07
Somewhere east of here is a place to call our own Somewhere far from the light of Sacramento It will be a place of joy and safety A place where love is less costly And in the night we will steal my parent’s car We’ll reach the border by the morning star We will finally be free and happy And I will love you, and you will love me And my reflection In the rearview mirror Is the only image That is clear So hold on Hold on, cuz I am sure I don’t wanna live here anymore
2.
Sure as a surgeon before he commits the act We cling to the forests, headlights cut through the black Pale light reflecting off the traffic signs Contracting the pupils in your bloodshot eyes We sing for the winter, we sing for the spring We cry for the glory that our future will bring We breathe in adrenaline and the cool air Windows rolled down, your laughter cascading everywhere We stop for breakfast at 7 am Nobody questions us, and we don’t question them We pass through quickly as the night expires And dawn comes over the universe and sets it All on fire
3.
I watched you drive through Arizona Filled with purpose far from home But the car sputtered out And we stopped in a moment of silence Your delicate fingers gripped the wheel You tore your throat from all the screaming But your glistening eyes They shone like blue diamonds And you were as sweet As September rain We spent that spring in a trailer park Slept with the seats down in the car Kept awake by the barking Of dogs going hungry And we would ache in the mornings And we would work for gasoline Held alive by the fear We would fade into nothing And I remember the waking pain Of not being anyone Of not being anywhere But you were as sweet As September rain
4.
Flagstaff 02:20
Turn out of Flagstaff Take I40 east We can make it to the border By nightfall at least The shadows of the mountains Watch us as we pass Our prayers whistle in the wind: May we find peace at last You turn west towards home Or towards nothing at all When your cell phone rings You don’t answer the call I ask you who it was You don’t say anything You just give me that stupid look As the sky turns pint I pry you for answers There’s a stiff crease in your brow And you slam your hands on the glove compartment There’s no stopping you now You spit searing shrapnel Like a bursting grenade And there’s nothing of my heart Left to save Summer fills our lungs As Arizona fades from view I mean it when I say There’s something wrong with you
5.
Sometimes you look so gently at me Sometimes we sing Sometimes we scream so violently That the whole care rings Some days you show me who I am And the beauty of forgiveness Those days I love you more Than the world could ever witness So cover me with guilt Til I am good and buried Oh weigh me down with hatred More than I could ever carry Spit at me your platitudes And leave me behind And I hope you never make it to The Texas-New Mexico line And you ran from all your fears With nowhere to return to I followed you to nowhere Without a second thought And we need each other dearly Like the dead are gonna rot And you cannot grow without me I cannot grow without you You cannot grow without me I cannot grow without you
6.
The stars Are pure and plentiful tonight So I pull the car over And turn off the headlights Doc Watson Coming in on the radio And you You fell asleep Several hours ago I step Into the grass a hundred miles from Abilene In one small moment The vastness of the sky Is overwhelming I think to wake you But something selfish Tries to stop me I take one Long minute To breathe
7.
The Texas heat passes through you As the sweat pours down your nose And you stand breathing heavily on the levees As you wonder where the Trinity goes Cicadas are playing their music The mosquitoes are eating me alive And the bridge that crosses over the river Is beautiful, tangled, and wide And you think For a moment About a kiss on my forehead But the flowers you picked in Waco Are already dead We sit on a quilt that your sister made For you when you were born And you trace the familiar stitches with your fingers In the places where it is torn We eat in a comfortable silence For one moment there’s a chance Watermelon on your lips and on your shirt And you holding my hand And you think For a moment About a kiss on my forehead But the flowers you picked in Waco Are already dead
8.
Durant, OK 02:12
We roll over the border Giving Eisenhower the finger We pull into the nearest somewhere And park in the casino We see signs from local churches asking If we’ve found the light They say: Honey if you’re worried Know that it’ll be alright You kiss me with your mouth open In the parking lot It was a clear and warm reminder You’re the only thing I’ve got We get out of the car And you take me by the hand As we settle into evening In Durant, Oklahoma Armed with fake IDs And your new septum piercing We drink wine From California With these sweet tattoos Running up and down our arms And the bright, setting sun Will keep us from harm
9.
Its a cold day in hell From right where I stand Pigs are embracing their wings As the soar far above the land The way you said so firmly “I wanna go home” I know that you’re much to afraid To do anything on your own And its not that I think that you’re lying Its just that I know that you are Somewhere way out in Kansas Is the dead dream of your shooting star You turn and you look out the window With nothing to say The wind shifts wildly around us There’s rain on the way Static from the radio Fills up the car And a small voice wishes us good days Wherever we are And its not that I think that you’re lying Its just that I know that you are Somewhere way out in Kansas Is the dead dream of your shooting star And its not that I think that I love you Its just that I know that I do You may think that they miss you back home But I know that isn’t true
10.
Shelter 03:56
You’re in awful mood I can tell from how you stand As we wait in line for food at the shelter The way you hold my hand So firmly that it hurts I tell you that I want to understand And you summon up a demon to give your hatred form As if anything you say to me could hurt me Some people start to stare at us Your cheeks are streaked with salt As the sky begins to cover up your anger And the first drops are small As they dance across your face We make it safe inside before the worst begins to fall But we sit there cold and hungry Like we have a thousand times And you lean across the table to place your lips on mine The storm continues on We have no choice but to leave We face the world beneath a leaking awning You turn to look at me And your eyes are clear and bright As we take our final steps into Missouri And you press your chest right into mine And slowly say my name As if my feeble broken body could protect you from rain But I pull you close And I’m holding on
11.
Vultures 04:21
I think a lot about the sun And how one day it will explode You think a lot about me When your eyes are on the road Cuz there’s only so much to talk about When I am with you all the time But we’re settling into the silence With love, with love on our minds Sleep comes over me Like a man with a morphine cloth Its unexpected and violent I bite my lip, and the blood drips off Trees are greener around us As we pass through southern Illinois But I think I miss the sunshine I think I miss the California soil And I dream of vultures Soaring overhead If I can’t have your in my life I’m better off dead I dream of vultures Soaring violently, circling overhead If I can’t have you in my life I am better off I am better off dead
12.
When summer ends in California And the wildfires have all gone out And the days are long and meaningless And my body’s full of drought When the sky is changing colors And the clouds all disappear That’s when I choose to remember Ever being here I was driving us home, you were sleeping When I hear your open your lips Air flows through your vocal chords And you ask me if I want kids The sun pierces straight through my glass And all of my instincts fail We swerve straight into the median And the tires hit the rail And my reflection In the rearview mirror Was never as clear as I made it out to be So I will wait For all the sirens to go And night falls over Sacramento

about

We cut through New Mexico like locusts through a wheat field. The exhaust fumes from our 1994 F150 filled the empty road behind us. The CD in the player whirred back to the start again, but you didn't try to eject it this time. Beyond my window, the mesas rose and fell. The windswept grasses and shrubs grew out of the pale brown dirt in patterns like diseased skin. I saw black birds circling to the south, waiting to descend. I tapped your shoulder, and your eyes drifted from the road. You watched them for a long time. Then you turned off the stereo. It was still and hot and quiet, and I was hungry.

credits

released August 9, 2019

Levees is Justin Mills
vocals, banjo, guitar, keys
all songs written and performed by Justin Mills
nature sounds courtesy of Aaron D. Pate (editor_adp) on freesound.org

cover art by Oren Fisher
layout by Oren Fisher and Molly Harras

special thanks to Molly, Sophia, and Matt
leveesfolk@gmail.com

© 2019 Levees
All rights reserved.

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Levees Chicago, Illinois

Levees is songs for agoraphobic vampires (they/he)

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